The Great Escape.... More About My Time In Massachusetts

When I left Georgia to move to Massachusetts it was pretty scary for me... I'm southern girl and had only been out of the south on a couple of vacation trips when I was small... once to NYC when I was about 2 years old that I don't remember at all but I've seen pictures... and once to Indianapolis when I was about 7... it was a trip to visit my stepdad's friend and we were at their house the whole time so no real vacation fun... I just remember playing with their kids and the loooong drive. I'm not the type to take huge risks... I like to play things pretty safely... so packing up everything I owned and my 3 kids and moving up north to make a new life for us and possibly be with someone whom I had never met in person was very unlike me... but it felt so right that I had to do it... I couldn't not do it... every part of my being was pushing me to just go.

The other thing was that I could only tell a very few people what my plan was... Adrian knew of course... and my Mom and my sisters and my best friend from online Cyn.... I couldn't tell anyone else... not even my kids... because if their father found out he would try to kill me... he had already cut my phone lines in the middle of the night 3 times.... and he had told me repeatedly over the years... and even in front of my kids... that if I ever tried to leave him he would cut my head off. So yes I was terrified... and thrilled to be going as far away from him as possible. I still feel bad that I couldn't tell my kids and let them say goodbye to their friends and family.... but it was necessary for my safety to keep it from them.

I got an apartment in Mass and a job as an assistant manager at Fashion Bug.... I hadn't worked in 8 years since my boys were born... we received help and counseling from a Women's Services agency... and Adrian was just wonderful as our relationship grew in the following 18 months in Mass. All was good until someone called DSS on us.... they were accusing me of neglect because I was under court order to send my kids to visit their father... if I didn't send them for the court ordered visit I would be arrested... and if I did send them DSS would take them from me and put them in foster care... along with other things that they put my family through.... I was between a rock and a hard place so to speak. I knew my kids would be safe because their father was living with his parents and they would not let him hurt them. And soooo my second escape from abuse... this time from DSS.... was planned.

So when summer came I put my kids on a plane to Georgia for the last time... and I felt such huge relief that they were safe from DSS... I no longer had to worry about them showing up to take my kids every time someone knocked on my door. And it was very strange to actually be relieved that I was sending them to be with their father. But I knew they were more safe with him than they were in Mass. We loaded up all of our belongings onto a truck for the second time and headed back to Georgia a month later... we had to get everything in order financially before we could leave. I was never so happy to be back home in the south and to see the mountains that surrounded me all of my life... I never knew I would miss looking up and seeing those mountains. It was so good to see my family again.... we were home... and we were all safe. And so we have been back in Georgia for 10 years now. Our life has never really been easy... but we have made the best of it.... we have survived! Adrian has been a wonderful husband to me and an amazing role model and parent for my kids. We have gone back to Mass to visit a couple of times... Adrian's family is there..... and I love to go to Salem. But I don't think I'll ever move back up there. And that is my story... the short version... even though it was pretty long.

Thank you all for your wonderful comments and Anniversary wishes.... and I'm glad you liked the pics of my family :)

A Lil Enchanted,
~LaShan~

Thanksgiving Anniversary

Well Thanksgiving is over.... can you believe it.... and Christmas is officially here. We had a nice dinner at my Mom's house yesterday... just Adrian, Steffie, myself, my Mom and her boyfriend Winston. It was a small dinner but very yummy.... and we had a nice visit afterwards just talking and watching Steffie play.

Yesterday was also our 11th wedding anniversary. We were married on Thanksgiving day of 1998. We met online on Thanksgiving night of 1997 in the AOL Stevie Nicks chat room. It was a very magickal time that is very hard to explain... it was just one of those times when the universe works it's own magick to bring certain people together and brings about changes that were never forseen... or planned.... they just happen because they are meant to happen... the timing was right... and everything fell into place exactly as it was suposed to. Many wonderful people came into my life at that time... and it was a time I will never forget and never cease to see the magick in. Adrian lived 1800 miles away in Massachusetts... I of course lived in Georgia... I was in an abusive marriage of 12+ years.... and on the brink of divorce. I felt trapped with no way out until the magick started... things started happening that opened my prison door.... and showed me a way to free myself... and in the midst of the magick and my way to freedom Adrian just happened along as well. For the first time in years I felt hope and actually dared to believe in a better life for myself and my kids. So over the course of that year I divorced and moved to Massachusetts and got my own apartment and a job and started to make a new life. It was pretty scary and not exactly easy... but things did seem to fall right into place beautifully. We were married the following Thanksgiving night in a nice lil restaurant banquet room in front of a fireplace. We never had a honeymoon... and I had hoped that on our 10th anniversary we could do that for ourselves... but we still couldn't.... oh well... there's always the 20th right?! I don't even have any pics of my absolutely exquisite wedding gown or Adrian looking all handsome in his top hat and tails... the camera chose that day to tear up and no one else seems to have taken any either.... but OMG he did look handsome :)... the image is burned into my mind.

So occasionally our anniversary does fall right on Thanksgiving day... the other years we argue over when exactly our anniversary is... I say it is on Thanksgiving because we deliberately picked Thanksgiving for our wedding day... he says it on the 26th... whether it is Thanksgiving or not. I guess we are both right :)

So to my dear husband... Happy Thanksgiving and Happy Anniversary! And I do expect a honeymoon on our 20th!

A Lil Enchanted,
~LaShan~